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Who hurt you
When two people are in a long-term relationship, they stop seeing one other through fantasy eyes. They begin to form a deep link, learn how to resolve problems, and eventually accept the defects in order to get along and maintain the relationship. Of course, neither person must be abusive or toxic in order for this to work.
Couples who are able to make it work do not separate. If you get back together with an ex, because you are still you and they are still themselves, the revived relationship will quickly revert to the state that caused the breakup in the first place, and the relationship will end again. Obviously there are exceptions.
Most people don't change. They can change their habits, they can change their looks but they can't change who they are from within. The whole idea of rekindling with an old partner often revolves around excusing adultery or abuse, which should never be the case in a relationship. A relationship is supposed to make you feel wanted and loved, not make you feel that you're being taken for granted.
I'm not saying it's always the case, or that two people cannot come back together after resolving their issues but to romanticize the idea of forgiving the unforgivable icks me. Let's draw the line between being mature about a relationship and speaking the romance book language about it. There's no 'meant to be' in real life. Stay where you feel loved and respected both.